Comment: I'm posting this only for awareness of how others think. If anything, it can help us to prepare for common objections and be ready with a reply.
Greg Sellnow: Do we really need to outlaw fragrances?
Here's a piece of proposed legislation that I think kind of stinks. Rep. Karen Clark, DFL-Minneapolis, last week introduced a bill to create an awareness campaign about the harmful effects of colognes, perfumes and other fragrances in our schools.
Originally, Clark had proposed that fragrances (whatever that means) be banned from all Minneapolis public schools, apparently with the hope that the move would set the tone for other districts.
But she later scaled back the proposal to a voluntary fragrance awareness campaign -- as opposed to an outright ban on perfume, cologne and God knows what else kids are wearing to school these days to help them smell right.
Clark wants students and parents to understand how harmful fragrances can be to people with asthma and other respiratory conditions.
Apparently, teenage boys are the primary targets of this legislation. They're accused of dousing themselves in the popular Axe body spray and other aromatic substances because they either a) believe it attracts droves of girls who look like Victoria's Secret models, or b) are trying to cover up the odoriferous result of too many days without a shower.
As the father of a teenaged boy, and having once been one myself, I feel the need to stand up for young males in the foul fragrance fight.
Sure, some people -- especially teenagers -- tend to go a little overboard when it comes to fragrances. It takes a while to figure out that a tiny dab -- as opposed to a half-cup -- of cologne is all you need. The problem here, as one of my daughters has not so politely pointed out to her younger brother (who does shower daily, by the way), is that: "When you put that stuff on, after a while you can't smell yourself. But, believe me, everyone else can."
And, yes, I feel for those who are sensitive to strong fragrances. While I can't claim that perfumes and colognes make me sick or cause me to gasp for breath, I generally don't like being around people who are wearing them. These fragrances all smell the same to me -- like dryer exhaust.
But do we really need to outlaw body fragrances? I was talking to my wife about this the other night and she said it's almost as if we're headed toward a "hypoallergenic" society where everything we do might offend those around us or make them sick.
I thought she had a good point. We have to be careful about what colognes we wear because they might spark a respiratory fit. We have to establish rules about what sorts of foods we can eat in the workplace because the odor might cause a co-worker to upchuck. We have to be careful about what kind of hand sanitizer or lotion we use at our desks because they might cause someone in a nearby cubicle to call for an ambulance. We even have to watch what kind of fabric softener we use on our clothes because there might be someone within 200 feet of us whose olfactory senses just can't tolerate Snuggle.
I'm not disputing whether these sensitivities are genuine. People who have them aren't faking it. I've suffered from what used to be called "hay fever" for as long as I can remember, and I'm miserable every summer when the ragweed goes to seed. I'm also allergic to cats, which is probably why the one who lives in our house insists on sleeping in my lap when I'm reading or on our bed when I'm in it.
But that doesn't mean I lock myself in the house whenever the pollen's flying or lobby to have Phoebe put to sleep every time I start sneezing. And I realize that, unlike tobacco smoke, coal dust or asbestos, long-term exposure to these things probably isn't going to kill me. So, I put up with them.
That's why I don't think we need the Legislature telling us what kind of fragrances we can wear in school -- or, for that matter, what kind of food we can eat at our desk or what kind of hand lotion we can use.
Or even -- gasp! -- how often adolescent boys should shower.
